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There was a time when I did have a full and adventuresome life full of friends, family, leisure pursuits etc, but I see no point in living in the past anymore and have decided to get honest with myself and accept the fact that right now Im in this state of limbo. I always used to think of people who were open minded as a bit nutty, and I now know why; because Im so open minded that I cant make a decision. Should I take out the trash? Should I eat something? Should I see if the mail has arrived? Should I pay this now? I dont know what to do, or if there is even anything to do. Someone just told me to, "do something even if its wrong." Well, Im effectively doing nothing. Does that count?
I know that I will probably feel better if I do something, but my own mind has turned against me and is telling me that it wont last and eventually I will have to go do something else because Im just going to end up right back here in this state of despondent indecision. Im posting this ad with no intention of ever meeting anyone. This may sound depressing or like some self deprecating rant, but it really isnt. I dont want to inflict any more of my negativity on anyone else other than what you can handle viewing from your screen. Anything more would probably be unbearable. I know it is for me. At least it would be if I wasnt so overwhelmed by this pervasive apathy that surrounds me like some impenetrable protection from any and all thought of escape.
While it may be true that I need to be cheered up, I seriously dont want to be cheered up. Im not looking for a pep talk, nor am I looking for someone to scold me for being such a loser. In a nutshell, what Im looking for is for someone who may be almost as bored as I am to share whats going on in their life.
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P.S. If at all possible, please make every effort to use proper punctuation, grammar, capitalization, spelling, etc. Im already hopelessly confused enough without trying to decipher all the up to date abbreviated textspeak.

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